Bluestocking Catalogue #12
Preparing for Winter, Mom's Apple Cake, and one of my favorite newsletters.
When I was a kid, my friends and I would play Preparing for Winter in our back yard. My imagination was steeped in Laura Ingalls Wilder’s tales, and a friend had built us a play log cabin in our backyard. My siblings, friends and I would race around the backyard pretending to be settlers, collecting acorns and sticks and stockpiling them in the tiny attic of the log cabin to stock up for the winter - then run inside for a real snack.
As I look back, I recognize a. how problematic Wilder’s depiction of Native folks is and b. how survival instinct is hard-wired into humans. This memory feels relevant because I’m feeling a similar energy this fall. The forces around us feel as wild and out-of-control as ever, which often leaves me feeling powerless. I find that taking back choice where I can helps me feel more grounded. Here are some of the choices I’m making as I Prepare for Winter in fall 2020. (I read an article about this a month+ ago that inspired this list, but I can’t find it now. I’ll share if I find it again!)
Right now I feel really lucky to live in the Midwest, where we have an abundance of literal space. It’s easy to access outdoor spaces to accommodate social distancing. We had a fairly mild summer, so it was easy to reconnect with friends safely outside. My book club met in the park, which was so dreamy we wondered why we hadn’t done it before. One friend and I met to walk every week. Occasionally, Noah and I would go out to eat and sit outside. The ability to have these social interactions safely was a lifeline for my mental health. My biggest concern about this winter - as it regards my own wellness - is that it will be more difficult to hang out outside with friends, and thus more difficult to see people safely.
Here are several solutions I’ve come up with to address this concern:
I’m going to upgrade my winter coat situation so it’s easier for me to be outside with folks for an extended time.
We’re going to buy some wood so we can host bonfires in our backyard.
I’ve set up a monthly Zoom date with my best friends from college. At the beginning of the pandemic, we talked a lot and then it petered out over the summer as Zoom fatigue hit home. We talked for the first time last night, and it was two hours of joy & laughter. I painted my nails as we talked about everything and nothing, from the TV shows we’re loving to the deep pain we face.
We love connecting in this way, but because we cross several time zones, we don’t connect if we don’t plan for it. Having a monthly check-in planned with these pals not only gives me something to look forward to but helps us all invest in our relationship during a time when we can’t travel to be together, as we normally do. Here’s a picture from the FriendCation we took together in spring 2019.
My second biggest concern is for my own mental health. As I imagine is true for a lot of people, my general anxiety is fairly high at the moment - and much more likely to spike than usual. I also know that winter- especially after Christmas - tends to be a tough time for me. I already use a happy lamp and take vitamin D, both of which are lifesavers if you live in a place that tends to be gray during the winter like I do. Here are two choices I’m making to invest in my mental health:
I signed up for a weekly yoga class that is either super small in-person, or that I can join on Zoom. I need the accountability. Yoga helps me feel more connected to and at ease with my body, which then of course impacts my mind.
I asked a trusted friend for a list of local therapists she recommends. I’ve been to therapy during different seasons of life, and it truly is lifechanging. As I’ve learned more about myself and different types of therapies, I want to go back to therapy with some specific goals, and I want to try a different type of therapy.
I’ve learned that it takes time to find and then get an appointment with a therapist, and you have to deal with insurance, so I’m starting the process now. My “ask me in 3 months” goal (inspired by this podcast episode) is to have actually been to 1 therapy appointment with said therapist. Hopefully it won’t take 3 months, but I like a low bar goal. :)
Prioritizing sleep.
Like I said, making these choices now helps me feel less worried about the coming winter season. I share them here, not because you need to make the same choices, but maybe because they’ll spark your own list of steps you can take now to be as healthy and happy as possible during the coming covid winter. I’d love to hear your list; leave a comment or just reply to this email.
Mom’s Apple Cake
In my mom’s kitchen, the actual recipe book this apple cake comes from is falling apart. I have a photocopy of it, complete with my mom’s notes: “excellent / quick & easy.” (I love marginalia.) This cake is delicious and not-too-sweet, with a texture that’s hard to describe so I’ll show it to you:
See? The top is crunchy, and the inside texture resembles a pumpkin or banana bread rather than a traditional sponge cake.
I’ve transcribed the recipe below & added my own notes. Enjoy.
Ingredients:
5 apples, peeled & cubed (I’ve done it with red & green apples, but granny smiths are my favorite.)
2 cups sugar
1 cup cooking oil (I use canola)
2 eggs
3 cups sifted flour (Don’t skip the sifting.)
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1 teaspoon nutmeg
1 cut chopped nuts (I always use pecans.)
Instructions:
Put the apples into a large bowl and cover with the sugar. Let stand 10 minutes.
While you’re waiting, preheat the oven to 350 degrees, sift the flour, chop the pecans, & stir the dry ingredients together.
Blend oil & eggs into apple mixture.
Add dry ingredients & nuts, blending just to mix. (It will be quite dense. Don’t worry about it.)
Pour into a greased 9 x 13 inch pan and bake at 350 for 50 minutes. It usually takes 55 for me, or until a knife or toothpick comes out clean. Let cool 10 minutes before cutting. (The original recipe says to sprinkle granulated sugar over the top of the cake, but I never do.)
Erin H. Moon writes one of my favorite weekly newsletters. She’s funny & earnest and often shares the Best of the Internet - noteworthy tweets and videos. Each Friday I look forward to her emails, which make me cry or laugh or sometimes both. The comments section is so wonderful, and Erin is also hosting the We Got You! Club: a spreadsheet where people share their needs & other people help them out. It’s so good. Erin often but not exclusively writes about Christianity/ faith-related things. Here’s her Instagram. Get The Swipe Up each Friday here.
In Conclusion
Thank you for all your kind anniversary wishes last week. We went away for 24 hours and had a lovely time together.
May you receive what you need today. May hope surprise you. May peace envelop you. May you know in your bones that you are loved.