Bluestocking Catalogue #24
Raspberry Swirl Cheesecake, Sarah Bessey's New Book, and living in Groundhog Week
Hi, everyone.
It’s been a second since I’ve checked in over here. A lot has happened, and also nothing has happened. Yesterday I was talking to Noah about how everything feels meh to me right now, and I reached for the metaphor of Groundhog Day we’ve all heard before. “More like Groundhog Week,” he said, and that resonated too - because although different days of the week have different flavors (Friday night is takeout night, weekends are for sleeping in & brunch), each week for the past month or so has felt and largely been the same. It sucks. (And I say that acknowledging how much privilege I have to complain about being bored of staying at home.)
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: this pandemic life is hard. It is not “normal” and expecting that we’ll be able to function “normally” is a fantasy. Maybe we don’t need to have such high expectations that we’ll feel a certain way or accomplish certain things. At the beginning of the pandemic, the Lazy Genius said in a podcast episode, “Not every day has to be a good day.” I clung to this idea in the pandemic’s early days (almost a year ago!) and am returning to it now. Of course I am affected by the trauma we’re living through: people are dying and suffering in a myriad of ways, some solvable (cough cough equitable access to quality healthcare cough cough) and others not. We’re losing a whole generation of Black parents. The teens I work with are not okay - they largely seem depressed or anxious or both. They are facing deep loss and/or grave responsibility (childcare, supporting their families financially etc.) while being isolated and largely without agency. At the same time, their developing brains are grappling with the complexity of the world and their own emerging identities. Can you imagine?
It feels really heavy to me. Witnessing suffering like this takes its toll, and I want to name that. Yet - as much as I’d like to Rip-Van-Winkle my way out of this shit - I also want to stay awake, to notice and name what’s happening around me, to be present with the people I can. This quote one of my college professors introduced me to comes to mind: Akira Kurosawa said, “The role of an artist is to not look away.”
How can I, how can we, “not look away” and be fully human during these apocalyptic times? I imagine the answer to that question is a little different for everyone. I rely on practices that help me stay grounded and present. For me those practices include journaling and singing and praying and meditating and taking hot baths and stupid little walks outside. Baking and reading (shocking, truly, given the premise of this newsletter) also help because they make me feel like myself.
This may seem antithetical to everything I just said, but I’m also trying to let myself be okay with oscillating between escapist coping strategies (like binging a TV series or submersing myself in a novel) and practices that help me be present. I need both, but I’m trying to bring more mindfulness to the times when I’m escaping (or “looking away”) so I at least realize what I am doing. I’m also trying to intentionally serve my community when and where I can mostly because it makes ME feel better to do something nice for someone else.
TL;DR: This is (still) really hard. You are not alone over there.
Ready for some recs? I’ve got some good ones!
RASPBERRY SWIRL CHEESECAKE
Maybe you still want a Valentine’s dessert for tonight. Or maybe you just want cheesecake now that I’ve mentioned it. I made this recipe 2x this week - once for “practice” (aka so I could eat it) and once to give away for a friend’s birthday. So I feel confident recommending it. It’s DELICIOUS. The raspberry cuts the sweetness of the creamy cheesecake perfectly without overwhelming.
I haven’t made a lot of cheesecakes, so I’m not sure how fussy this recipe is compared to most. You do have to pay attention to the details in a way you might not have to with, say, cookies. IMHO, it’s very worth it and looks stunning when complete.
I am NOT food photographer, y’all. 😅 This was my first attempt at the swirling top, and I share it so you can see the possibilities. The second was better.
My notes/ adaptions: I couldn’t find chocolate cookies when I needed them, so I used graham crackers. They worked just fine, but probably added to the overall sweetness. To combat the sweetness, the second time I made this, I cut the sugar by 1/4 cup and used all the raspberry sauce - I followed Deb’s advice to drizzle it between “layers” of the cheese cake filling so there would be more raspberry tang throughout. I’m not sure how necessary these modifications would be if you used the chocolate crust, although I say THE MORE RASPBERRY THE BETTER. Last note: I was afraid it wasn’t done the first time because it still seemed too wiggly, but after cooling overnight in the fridge, it was perfect. Be not afraid.
I want to buy two smaller cheesecake pans (about 4”) so I can make this recipe in two smaller cheesecakes because, in the age of covid when I can’t have people over to eat cheesecake with me, Noah and I don’t realllly need a whole 9” cheesecake. 🤷I’ll keep you posted on that venture.
A RHYTHM OF PRAYER by Sarah Bessey
Sarah Bessey is one of my real-life matron saints. I’ve read all of her books and most of her work online, and I subscribe to her Substack. I’ve talked about her before here because her voice and work gives me hope.
This is a Jesus-y book, so if that’s not your thing, feel free to skip down.
This is Bessey’s fourth and newest book - a compilation of prayers from diverse group of women offering written prayers/poetry/ practices for different moments in life. This book is divided into three sections: orientation, disorientation, and reorientation. I’m planning to read it slowly, maybe a prayer a day. Bessey explains that she wanted to show people struggling with a faith transition or evolution that prayer was still accessible to them. In her introduction, Bessey writes,
The point of this is not to give you prayers to pray but to show you: you still get to pray. Prayer is still for you. You still get to cry out to God, you still get to yell, weep, praise, and sit in the silence until you sink down into the Love of God that has already been holding you whether you knew it or not (xv.)
Can you see why I love Bessey so much? Her sentences often make me weep. And although I’ve already been comforted by its pages, this book does not merely comfort - it’s also about resistance to Empire and prophetic truth-telling. Some prayer titles include “Examen Your Politics” and “A Liturgy for Disability” and “Reconciliation Soup” and “A Prayer for the Tired, Angry Ones” and “A Prayer Against Efficiency.” Bessey is reimagining and reclaiming the very idea of “prayer” by broadening the metaphorical table and amplifying other’s voices. A few writers I already love are included in this collection (Barbara Brown Taylor, Kaitlyn Curtice and Nadia Bolz-Weber) and I am excited for this book to introduce me to other writers, poets and faith leaders I’m sure I will love.
RED RISING by Pierce Brown
I’m a sucker for YA dystopian novels. As I’ve mentioned before, I took a break from dystopia after the election of 2016, as the genre no longer felt quite so removed from my everyday existence. I’m not sure why, but I’m enjoying dystopian again. I really enjoyed Red Rising, which is the first novel in a series of 5. If you liked the Hunger Games, you will like this.
Brown’s world-building is immersive but does not overwhelm the plot (ahem Tolkien ahem and my apologies in advance to my friend Bri.) The book’s premise is simple: your role in life (which includes multiple planets other than earth) is based on your color. Reds, as you might imagine, are the virtually enslaved people at the bottom. This book is fast-paced and plot-driven, and my one quibble so far is that the character development has been a bit lacking. This makes sense, since Brown is obviously setting the stage for a longer story, but I hope that the main character Darrow has more and more nuanced characterization moving forward.
I’ve already requested the second novel from the library, and it popped up on my Libby app last night, so I am planning on diving into it soon. This is a great book if you’re looking for the “mindful escapism” I mentioned above, or if you love YA dystopia. Let me know if you’ve already read it, or if you pick it up. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
TBR (To Be Read) Stack
Y’all, I am having trouble reading physical books. Don’t get me wrong, I love physical books - they are gorgeous and shareable and tactile in a satisfying way. I especially love underlining and annotating in nonfiction in hard cover. But my Kindle Paperwhite is so light that I can hold it for hours without wrist strain, and it has a built-in light. My kindle is definitely my preferred way to read fiction, even though I feel some shame in admitting that.
So I’m trying to curb my physical book buying because I know I’m less likely to consume especially fiction that way, but I have all these lovely books above that I really want to read (several of these authors I’ve read before, so I bought their book because I expected to love it and wanted to support their work.) Despite that real enthusiasm, I just haven’t touched these, even though they are on a literal separate TBR pile on my bookshelf. I’m thinking about getting a small u-shaped pillow for when I read physical books, especially hardbacks, to prop them up so I don’t have to hold them. Or maybe I’ll hide my Kindle and keep a physical book on my nightstand for before-bed reading. Any other suggestions welcome.
Not pictured TBR (on my Kindle) Felix Ever After, Hamnet, The Most Beautiful Thing I’ve Seen, Words in Deep Blue, The Round House and many more
Currently listening to (it’s so good): There, There by Tommy Orange
Currently reading (and loving so far!): What Kind of Woman by Kate Baer, Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston, Intuitive Eating by Tribole and Resch
That’s all for today, folks.
Love you lots. Happy Gal/Pal/Valentine’s Day.
p.s. Affiliate (Bookshop) links in this post.